Job app filled out by 75 year old senior citizen submitted to Wal-Mart.

Name: George Martin;

Sex: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman;

Desired Position: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.;

Desired Salary: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.;

Last Position Held: Target for middle management hostility.;

Previous Salary: A lot less than I'm worth.;

Reason for Leaving: It sucked.;

Hours Available for Work: Any.;

Preferred Hours: 1:30-3:30 p.m. Monday, Tuesday & Thursday.;

May We Contact Your Curent Employer?: If I had one, would I be here?;

Do You Have a Car?: I think the more appropriate question here would be, "Do you have a car that runs?";

Have You Received Any Special Awards or Recognition?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, so they tell me.;

Sign Here: Sagittarius   back...